Addiction
by Liz011
Summary: Set after My Bloody Valentine. Sam is craving demon blood again and is interested in using hypnosis to get over it. It'll take a couple of chapters to get to the M-rated material.
1. Chapter 1

Sam paced around the small motel room, waiting for Dean to finish his shower. He'd gone over this several times in his head, but still wasn't sure how Dean would react. Still, he had to at least ask.

He heard the water turn off. A moment later, Dean emerged from the bathroom wrapped in a towel.

"All yours, Sammy," he announced.

Sam took a deep breath. "Dean, I've been thinking. After what happened with Famine, I've been having a kind of hard time."

"You mean you're craving demon blood again," Dean replied, turning away to pull on his boxers.

Sam winced a bit at his tone, but pressed on. "I don't _want_ to fall off the wagon again, Dean. I've been looking into ways to get past this."

"Somehow, I doubt there's a rehab program for demon blood addiction," Dean replied coolly, pulling a shirt over his head.

"No, I know that," Sam told him. "But I've been reading up on the things people do to get over an addiction, and-please don't laugh-I think it might be worth trying hypnosis."

Dean paused halfway through pulling on his left sock and turned to look at Sam. "Hypnosis?" he repeated, "Sam, I'm ninety percent sure that's a load of horsecrap and the other ten percent doesn't want to let some stranger loose in your brain."

"I wasn't planning to talk to a stranger about this," Sam told him. "I was actually hoping you could do it."

"Me? Sam, I don't know the first thing about hypnosis."

"I've got a book about it," Sam answered, pulling a large paperback from the front pocket of his laptop bag. "I've been leafing through it and researching on the internet a bit, and I figure it couldn't hurt to try."

Dean was eyeing the book like he thought it might be cursed.

"Please," Sam begged. "Dean, I hate the way this makes me feel and I hate that you can't trust me right now and I think this might be a way to set things right. At least take the book." He put on the best baby brother puppy dog eyes he could manage. Finally, Dean reached out and took the book.

"_A Beginner's Guide to Hypnosis_," he read. "And this book will tell me how to fix you?"

Sam sat on the bed opposite Dean. "Not quite," he explained. "The book will tell you how to put someone into trance and how to deepen the trance, but beyond that it focuses more on stage hypnosis type stuff than on hypnotherapy. But-" he said quickly as Dean started to roll his eyes, "I've been reading up on how people use hypnotherapy to treat addiction. All you've got to do is just redirect the craving to something less dangerous."

"Redirect the craving?"

"Yeah."

"And what do I redirect it to?"

"Anything you like. I trust you, Dean. But in order for it to work well it should be something I already enjoy."

Dean looked at the book in his hand, then back up at his brother. "Anything I like?"

"Anything you like."

"So long as it's something you already enjoy."

"Pretty much."

"Alright, I'll see what I can come up with." He finished pulling his sock on and tossed the book into his bag.


	2. Chapter 2

A week later they were in a motel room in Nowheresville, Tennessee, recovering from a run-in with a Civil War ghost. Dean watched as Sam settled in, running through a familiar sequence of precautions and unpacking necessities like knives and toothpaste.

Finally, he cleared his throat. "Hey, Sam?"

"Yeah, Dean?" Sam replied, still rummaging through a duffle for his razor.

"I, um, I've been looking through that book you gave me," he managed.

Sam stopped. He looked at Dean. "Yeah?" he asked cautiously, "How was it?"

"Well," Dean replied, trying to ignore the tight feeling in his chest, "I think I might be ready to try some things out."

"Really?" Sam grinned. He moved the bag to the floor and perched on the edge of the bed. "That's great! I wasn't really sure you were going to read it, or how long it would take you to get through it, or how you would feel about it, or-"

"Okay, stop," Dean interjected. Sam stopped. "Good. Now, I can't promise this is actually going to work, because I've never tried it before and according to your book some people don't even go into trance, but I'm ready to give it a try. It's not gonna work if you're talking the whole time though."

"Right. Sorry. I understand. Tell me what to do."

Dean looked at his brother, perched on the edge of the bed and staring at him. "First off, relax. Lay down or something."

Sam did as he was told.

Dean took a deep breath and went over what he had learned from Chapter One: An Introduction to Induction. (Keep your voice even so you sound confident. Speak slowly. Pause often. Start with a simple instruction to focus your subject's attention.)

"Alright, Sam. Focus on your breathing."

(Now elaborate on that to guide them into relaxation.)

"You're taking deep, calming breaths. In... and out.

"Notice how easily your breathing settles into a regular rhythm. This happens naturally, with no effort at all."

(Encourage them to relax their body, starting with one specific area.)

"As you focus on your breathing, you can feel your body start to relax. It starts at your shoulders."

(Describe what form this relaxation takes.)

"You can feel all the tension melting out of your shoulders, leaving them feeling warm and loose. Tension melting away easily."

(Talk about that relaxation spreading through their body from that starting point.)

"This feeling starts to spread. It moves down your arms... across your chest and back... down into your stomach..."

(Be sure to remind them how this affects them.)

"It melts away tension wherever it goes. Leaves your muscles feeling warm and loose.

"It continues down into your thighs,

"Descends into your calves,

"Makes its way out through the tips of your toes,

"Leaves your whole body feeling warm and relaxed. All the tension gone from your muscles. Feeling loose and heavy."

(Now you can work on relaxing their mind.)

"As your body relaxes, so does your mind. Stress and worries melting away just like the tension from your muscles.

"Stress drifting out of your mind each time you exhale,

"Replaced by a sense of peaceful calm each time you inhale.

"Exhaling stress,

"Inhaling calm."

(Start talking about how good this feels.)

"It feels so good to relax like this. To let go of your tension.

"It's such a pleasant feeling, just letting your mind go blank.

"So nice to relax, to let your mind drift lazily and just focus on my words."

(By now, your subject is probably in trance. Ask them a simple question to check.)

"Doesn't it feel good to relax like this?"

"Mmyeah," Sam mumbled. Aside from his half-open eyes, he looked for all the world like he was asleep. Breathing slowly, body relaxed.

"Good."

(You can now work on deepening the trance.)


	3. Chapter 3

Sam was feeling very relaxed. His body felt heavy and weak, like when you first wake up in the morning and can't be bothered to move yet. His mind was quieter than it had ever been. No thoughts buzzing about, no concerns about the apocalypse. Nothing. Just listening to Dean talk like his voice was the only thing that existed.

"As you continue to relax," Dean was saying, "you might notice that it feels good to agree with me."

_Yeah, that sounded good._

"That when you agree with me, it helps you to relax further."

_Relax further._

"Makes it harder to think."

_Harder to think._

"Makes you feel good."

_Feel good._

"And brings you deeper into trance."

_Deeper into trance._

"You've noticed this, haven't you, Sammy?"

"Mmmyeah," Sam mumbled again. Of course it felt good to agree with Dean. Dean always knew what he was talking about. And he had such a soothing voice.

"Very good," Dean told him. "You might also notice, as you continue to relax, that it feels good when I praise you."

_Yeah, that made sense._

"That when I praise you, it helps you to relax further."

_Relax further._

"Makes it harder to think."

_Harder to think._

"Makes you feel good."

_Feel good._

"And brings you deeper into trance."

_Deeper into trance._

"You've noticed this, haven't you, Sam?"

"Mmhmm," Sam managed. He was too relaxed to bother with actual words, but it still felt good to agree with Dean.

"Great," Dean answered.

Sam drifted a bit deeper into trance.

"You're very good at this, you know," Dean told him.

Sam drifted deeper.

"You find it so easy to relax."

_Easy to relax._

"You find it so easy to let go."

_Easy to let go._

"You're so good at just letting your mind go blank."

_Blank._

"It's a nice skill to have, isn't it?"

"Mmm," Sam answered. It felt good to be able to relax so completely for a change. To stop worrying about all the mayhem that went on his life. To just listen to Dean talk and let his mind go blank. And Dean had such a soothing voice. Sam could listen to him talk forever.

"Wonderful," came Dean's reply.

Sam let his brother's voice take him deeper into trance.

"Now, Sam," Dean was saying, "I'd like to give you a trigger to bring you back into trance more quickly and easily in the future. Would that be alright?"

"Mmm," Sam answered again. Anything Dean wanted to do would be fine.

"Great," Dean said. "Your trigger will be 'hellboy.' When we're alone and safe and I say 'hellboy' it will bring you back quickly and easily to this state of deep trance. 'Hellboy' melts the tension from your muscles. 'Hellboy' melts the thoughts from your mind. 'Hellboy' makes your body feel weak and heavy. 'Hellboy' makes your mind feel open and empty. 'Hellboy' lets your mind and body relax completely, bringing you back to this state of deep trance. Do you understand?"

"Mmm," Sam replied.

"Excellent. Now, Sam, I want to emphasize that this only works when I say it, only when we're alone, and only when we're safe. If anybody else says it, or if anybody else is present, or if we're in immediate danger, your trigger has no effect on you. Is that clear?"

"Mmm," Sam replied again.

"Great," Dean answered. "Now, Sam, I'm going to bring you out of trance. I'm going to count down from six. When I finish, you will be fully awake, feeling alert and refreshed. You got that?"

"Mmhmm."

"Wonderful.

"Six. You can feel yourself beginning to wake up.

"Five. You can feel the strength returning to your muscles.

"Four. You're becoming more aware of the world around you.

"Three. Drifting back up out of trance.

"Two. Almost there.

"One. Fully awake, feeling alert and refreshed.

"How are you feeling, Sammy?"

Sam rubbed his eyes and sat up. "I'm good," he said. "Relaxed. And good."

"Good," Dean smiled. "Tell me, Sam, how much do you remember?"

"Umm," Sam hesitated, "I remember breathing, and focusing on my breathing, and then something about a rhythm. It gets hazy after that. Is that alright?"

"Yeah, that's fine. That book you gave me said that it varies, and that people are less likely to remember details for deeper trances."

Sam smiled. "Not bad, considering you weren't even sure this would work," he teased. "So, am I cured now?"

"Not yet," Dean explained. "I did some reading online and they said that when doing something big like that, it's better to do it over a series of smaller trances. And I wanted this first trance to just test how well things worked. I gave you a trigger to go back into trance more easily next time."

"A trigger?" Sam raised his eyebrows. "Is that safe, considering how many enemies we have?"

"Really, Sammy, you don't think I'd take some precautions?" Dean rolled his eyes. "The trigger only works when I say it, only when we're alone, and only when we're safe. If any of those conditions aren't met, you're not going into trance."

Sam relaxed a bit. "Sorry," he said. "You're right. I should have known you'd look after me."

Dean smiled. "Alright, Sammy, go brush your teeth. We can pick this up again tomorrow night."

Sam started to protest, then caught a glimpse of the clock. He hadn't realized how much time had passed while he'd been in trance. He stood up and got ready for bed. He slept well that night.


	4. Chapter 4

Dean woke up first the next morning. Rather than going out to fetch coffee and breakfast and returning after Sam had showered and dressed, he laid down on the bed beside his brother and waited for him to wake up. When Sam awoke, Dean was beside him propped up on his elbow. Sam had barely opened his eyes before Dean moved in for a kiss.

"That's the first time you've kissed me since you found out about Ruby," Sam said when his brother had pulled away.

Dean smiled. "I feel much better now that I know we're working on things," he explained. Then he leaned in and whispered, "Hellboy."

Sam's body fell back into the mattress with a thud as his arms collapsed underneath him. One of his elbows was at an awkward angle, but he didn't seem to notice. He looked relaxed, comfortable. His breathing was slow and regular.

"Very good, Sammy," Dean told him, still a bit amazed that this was even working. "It's easy to fall back into trance, to let your mind and body relax…"

He spent the next several minutes bringing Sam deeper into trance, reminding him how good it felt to relax, how good it felt to agree with him, how easy it was to just let his mind go blank. When he was satisfied with the depth of the trance, he moved on to more pressing matters.

"Now, Sam," he said evenly, "I understand you've been having a hard time lately. That you've been craving demon blood and struggling to fight that craving. Is that correct?"

"Mmm," Sam answered.

"Tell me, Sam, why do you like demon blood so much?"

"It makes me feel strong. Powerful. I can protect you. Fight demons without hurting people." His voice was flat.

"But now you're struggling against that craving, right?"

"Mmhmm."

"That's good," Dean told him. "Tell me, why are you fighting that craving?"

"It leads to bad things. I started the apocalypse. You can't trust me anymore."

Dean took a deep breath. "Alright, Sam. I'm gonna explain something to you. You listening?"

"Mmm."

"Great. Here's the thing, Sam. You've never needed demon blood. What you really want is to be able to feel close to me. That's right, isn't it?"

"Mmhmm."

"Good. So when you think you're craving demon blood, you're not. You're really craving me. You realize that now, don't you?"

"Mmm."

"Very good. Tell me that you don't need demon blood," he commanded.

"I don't need demon blood," Sam answered.

"That's right. What do you need?"

"I need you."

"Very good, Sammy." Dean was enjoying this a bit more than he expected: Sam laying helplessly on the bed, repeating Dean's words back at him on command. He wondered for a moment exactly how much he could make Sam do in this state. But for now he had a task to focus on. "Tell me again that you don't need demon blood."

"I don't need demon blood."

"Good. What do you need?"

"I need you."

He ran Sam through this routine several more times to reinforce it before he started wrapping things up. Several minutes of Sam repeating "I don't need demon blood" and "I need you" just because Dean had told him to, and for the first time in over a year Dean was able to really believe that Sam meant what he said. He then repeated a couple of times that when Sam thought he was craving demon blood he was really craving Dean to make sure that would stick, then started working on bringing him up.

"Alright, Sam, I'm going to start bringing you out of trance now. You won't remember having been in trance. You'll think this is your first time waking up this morning. Do you understand?"

"Mmm."

"Good. Now I'm going to count down from six. When I finish, you'll be fully awake, feeling alert and refreshed.

"Six. You can feel yourself beginning to wake up.

"Five. You can feel the strength returning to your muscles.

"Four. You're becoming more aware of the world around you.

"Three. Drifting back up out of trance.

"Two. Almost there.

"One. Fully awake, feeling alert and refreshed."

When Sam awoke, Dean was beside him propped up on his elbow.

"Good morning, Sammy," Dean grinned.

"Hey there," Sam answered, a bit surprised to see his brother in his bed. Before he got a chance to ask about it, Dean moved in for a kiss.

"That's the first time you've kissed me since you found out about Ruby," Sam said when his brother had pulled away.

Dean smiled. "I feel much better now that I know we're working on things," he explained.

Sam smiled and moved in for another kiss.


	5. Chapter 5

Sam had forgotten just how good this felt. His brother's lips were soft and warm against his. The stubble on Dean's chin scratched his face as he moved closer. The sensation was familiar even after so much time, and Sam was amazed at just how comforting he found it. Slowly, he shifted onto his left side to face Dean, letting his right arm fall casually over his brother's waist.

Dean shifted a bit closer and flicked his tongue into Sam's mouth.

Sam found the bottom of Dean's shirt and slid his fingers inside, pressing his hand into his brother's back to pull him closer. He broke away from Dean's lips to nibble at his jawbone, and Dean responded by rolling his hips against Sam's.

"God, I've missed you," Sam sighed into Dean's neck, trembling slightly.

"I know," Dean answered, taking off his shirt as he rolled forward so that he was on top of Sam, who was now lying flat on his back. He rolled his hips against Sam's again. Sam arched his back and lifted his chin in response, allowing Dean to draw a line of kisses down his neck and bite his collarbone.

"Oh, God, Dean, I need you," Sam moaned.

Dean ran his left hand down the side of Sam's body, stopping when he reached his boxer shorts. "Say that again," he ordered.

"I need you," Sam repeated breathlessly.

Dean pulled Sam's boxers off and rested his hand on the front of his brother's hip. "Again," he commanded.

"I need you." Sam's heart was racing. His whole body was trembling with desire. Every bit of contact sent a jolt of pleasure up his spine, but it wasn't enough. He needed more. He needed Dean.

Dean obliged, moving his hand to slowly stroke Sam's shaft. Sam arched his back again and threw his head back and moaned. Dean leaned over his brother, resting his free arm on Sam's shoulder to pin him, and growled into his ear, "Say it again."

"I need you," Sam panted. Dean nibbled Sam's earlobe and rolled his hips forward. "Oh, God, Dean. I need you so bad. Please."

The arm attached to the shoulder Dean had pinned lay against the bed, fingers grabbing at the sheets, while the other tried desperately to pull Dean's body closer. But Dean held himself a few inches above his brother, keeping careful control of his movements. When he rolled his hips forward again, Sam's whole body tensed: his hips bucked forward, his back arched, and his fingers dug into Dean's skin.

Dean bit his lower lip to avoid crying out. "What was that, Sammy? Didn't quite catch it."

"I need you," Sam repeated, voice shaking. "Ohh, please. Please, Dean. I need you." Between Dean's hand still stroking his shaft, Dean's weight pressing him into the mattress, and Dean's hot breath on his neck, Sam was having a hard time focusing on forming sentences. He felt as though he was babbling incoherently, but every time he said "I need you" Dean rolled his hips forward again, sending a jolt of pleasure through Sam's body.

Dean stood up suddenly, taking Sam by surprise.

"Stay there," Dean told him, pulling off his own boxers (which Sam had completely forgotten he was still wearing). "I'm just finding some lube."

Sam was satisfied with this explanation, of course, but still found the thirty seconds it took Dean to return to bed far too long. When Dean returned to his place between Sam's legs, Sam sat up and threw his right arm around his brother, pulling him in for a kiss. With his left hand, he took the lube. With a bit of difficulty he managed to open it, squeeze some into his hand, reseal the bottle, and toss it aside. He rubbed his fingers into his palm a few times to warm it up, then started stroking Dean's shaft. He heard Dean inhale sharply.

Sam spread his legs a bit wider and moved closer. "I need you," he breathed into Dean's ear. "Please, Dean, I need you now."

Finally, Dean gave up on self-control. He hooked his arms under Sam's knees and lifted them to his shoulders, throwing Sam's upper body down into the mattress in the process. Slowly, he leaned forward and slid inside his brother, taking his time since he hadn't used his fingers beforehand and didn't want to hurt Sam.

Sam wasn't in the mood to take it slow, though. After how much time Dean had spent teasing him and making him beg, he was ready. He flexed his legs against Dean's shoulders to pull himself closer and moaned, "More, Dean."

Dean obliged, pumping deeper and picking up the pace, sending waves of pleasure through Sam's body.

"God, Sammy," Dean panted, "You don't know how hot you look right now. Love the way your body trembles. Love the way your hair sticks to your face. Love that shape your mouth makes when you moan."

The left side of Sam's mouth managed a bit of a smile for a moment. Then Dean jerked his hips upward and Sam opened his mouth wide for a loud moan. He felt Dean wrap his hand around his shaft again and start stroking, keeping pace with his hips.

Sam was moaning, licking his lips, biting his lower lip. Moaning, licking his lips, biting his lower lip. His hips were jerking involuntarily. His eyes kept rolling back into his head. Dean started circling his thumb in the precum at the head of Sam's cock.

"Dean," he panted, "Dean, that's so good."

Dean thrusted deeper and brought his hand to the base of Sam's cock, bringing it back up as he pulled back again.

"Oh, God, Dean," Sam moaned. His body was trembling with pleasure and aching for more. When Dean repeated this motion, Sam came. Waves of pleasure shook his body as he arched his back and let eyes roll back into his head.

When he recovered, he saw that Dean had finished as well. His face was flushed. Beads of sweat clung to his forehead. His pupils were so wide Sam could barely see the green in his eyes.

Dean leaned over to kiss Sam once, then rolled aside to fall back onto the mattress. Sam nuzzled his face into Dean's neck, and together they slept.


	6. Chapter 6

It was early afternoon by the time they awoke. They each took five-minute showers, dressed, and brushed their teeth before heading out to the nearest diner for food. By this point in the day, they were both famished, and even Sam made it halfway through his sandwich before opening his laptop to look for a job.

"No ghosts, demons, shifters, or evil sons of bitches of any kind until I finish my burger," Dean announced through a mouthful of beef as soon as Sam turned the computer on. Sam made a show of rolling his eyes, but kept quiet. Dean was always grateful when Sam kept quiet. Food was one of the few things in his life he could really enjoy, a pure physical pleasure untainted by grief, fear, or any kind of moral dilemma. He savored the crunch of the onions and the flavor of the meat as though it was the first burger he had ever tasted. After all, when you're acutely aware that any meal could be your last, you may as well make it an event.

Finally, the last bit of burger disappeared into Dean's mouth and he washed it down with a swig of beer. "Alright, what've you got?" he asked.

"So, get this," Sam replied, "Small town about an hour south of Nashville, happily married man just suddenly shoots his whole family. Two days later, the local pastor hangs himself, and the day after that a kindergarten teacher starts a fire and nearly burns down the school."

Dean raised his eyebrows. "You thinking demons?"

"I'm thinking demons," Sam answered.

"Well, alright then," Dean said, flagging down the waitress for the check.

"Dean," Sam said when the waitress had disappeared with Jason Higgins's credit card, "what about… you know… you said tonight, and we might run into a demon before then."

"We've got a couple of hours of driving ahead of us," Dean shrugged. "I'll take care of it on the way."

Sam frowned slightly. "You're sure that'll be enough?"

Dean paused to smile at the waitress while she returned his card. As they made their way out to the Impala, he said, "Seriously, Sam, this whole thing was your idea. Yes, it'll work. Though worst case scenario, if it doesn't, you'll just have to keep exercising restraint. You've managed fine so far, except for the incident with Famine which I maintain is not your fault."

"Yeah, but Dean," Sam argued as he got into the car, "it still shows that restraint isn't always enough. What if I'm not strong enough?"

Dean rolled his eyes and snapped, "Hellboy!"

For the second time that day, Sam's body collapsed, this time slumping into his seat in the passenger side of the Impala.

"Much better," Dean told him, taking a breath to steady himself. "It's so easy to just let yourself relax, to stop worrying about things, to just listen and relax…" He again spent several minutes deepening the trance. Reminding Sam how easy it was to relax, how easy it was to let go. Encouraging him to breathe deeply and let himself drift deeper.

By the time they reached the interstate, he was satisfied with the depth of the trance.

"Now, Sam," he said slowly, "We talked this morning about how you don't really need demon blood. You remember that now, don't you?"

"Mhmm," Sam answered.

"Very good. What do you need?"

"I need you."

_God, that was still so hot. Alright, Dean, focus._

"Tell me you don't need demon blood."

"I don't need demon blood."

"That's right. What do you need?"

"I need you."

This routine continued for the next thirty miles, only interrupted by the occasional "Take a deep breath to relax deeper." Another thirty miles of "I don't need demon blood" and "I need you." That oughta stick, Dean figured. So he moved on to calming Sam's nerves.

"Very good, Sammy," he said. "You won't be tempted by demon blood, because you know you don't need it. Isn't that right?"

"Mmm," Sam answered from the passenger seat.

"Excellent. Now, Sam, when I bring you out of trance you'll be feeling much better about this problem. You might still be a bit nervous, and ready to resist the urge to drink demon blood if necessary, but you trust me, and you'll know I've done something to help. Isn't that right?"

"Mmm."

"Great. So when I bring you out of trance, you'll know I've done something to help, and that will make you feel a bit better, won't it?"

"Mmm."

"Wonderful. Now I'm going to bring you out of trance. I'm going to count down from six, and when I finish, you'll be fully awake, feeling alert and refreshed and less nervous about your demon blood addiction. Do you understand?"

"Mmhmm."

"Wonderful.

"Six. You can feel yourself beginning to wake up.

"Five. You can feel the strength returning to your muscles.

"Four. You're becoming more aware of the world around you.

"Three. Drifting back up out of trance.

"Two. Almost there.

"One. Fully awake, feeling alert and refreshed.

"How are you feeling, Sammy?"

"Good," Sam answered. "Still pretty relaxed from the trance, and better about this hunt. How far have we gone?"

"About forty-five miles. We've still got another hour to go, get some rest."

Sam did as he was told. Dean was amazed.


End file.
